Give It Up and Move On

Editor’s Note: The following article is an excerpt from my manuscript detailing my own abuse. Please see “My Story of Abuse” under the category link.

Sad Girl

Easier said than done for many cases of abuse. Abuse can affect a person for their entire lifetime. Faulkner wrote, “The past is never dead. It’s not even past.” How true it is for so many cases of abuse. Continue reading “Give It Up and Move On”

Can’t Say “No?”

Woman No

Are you one of those women that never tells anyone no? Are you a people pleaser? If you answered yes to one of those questions, please read on. Sexual abuse breeds people pleasers who cannot say no even to sex! I know, I was one of those women. If I would have told one of my parents no, they would have broken me in half. I didn’t even think about telling anyone no because it would make a bad situation even worse. Continue reading “Can’t Say “No?””

Dissociative Identity Disorder

DID Graphic

Dissociative Identity Disorder is one of the most misunderstood disorders. Hollywood has portrayed the disorder as some psychotic, maniac like, “The Three Faces of Eve,” or “Sybil.” There are varying degrees of every disorder, and this applies as well to DID. In an attempt, to destigmatize the disorder, the DSM changed its’ name from Multiple Personality Disorder to Dissociative Identity Disorder. It does not appear to have done a lot to straighten out the misunderstanding of the disorder. Dissociation means to break away, disconnect or sever. Continue reading “Dissociative Identity Disorder”

Why We Are Addicts

Binding Chains

Addictions among child abuse victims are common. Addictions help us to escape the pain and numb us. But, there will be no recovery if you cannot experience your feelings. It is not uncommon for a survivor to have multiple addictions; some more dangerous and life-threatening than others.
Over the span of my life, I have had many addictions: alcohol, nicotine, sugar, sex, cannabis, shopping, over-achieving and toxic relationships. I am in recovery from alcohol, nicotine, sex, and toxic relationships. Was it difficult—absolutely. But, it is also very freeing, and you’ll experience such a sense of accomplishment. Continue reading “Why We Are Addicts”

The Child Is Never to Blame

The Child

The vast majority of child abuse victims believe their abuse was their fault–if only they’d been stronger, if they would have behaved or not lied, if they would have said no, and the list goes on. Maybe your abuser even told you it was your fault. My father told me I was bad and would accuse me of lying and doing things I didn’t do. He would say, “I have to punish you—you’ve made me. I can’t allow you to do things that are wrong or lie and do nothing about it. But, I will keep it our secret; and don’t you tell it.” He would threaten me with killing my pony, or my mother if I told anyone about our secrets. Continue reading “The Child Is Never to Blame”

Revictimization

Victim

Have you ever wondered why some people fall victim of sexual abuse more than once? Finding myself in this category—I asked myself how could it have happened again? I was a childhood victim of incest, and then at the age of thirteen, I was date raped. Later in life, I was sexually harassed by a college professor. And, I’ve been involved in relationships throughout my life with emotionally abusive men. Continue reading “Revictimization”

Psychological Disorders Associated With Child Abuse

Psycho Disorders

Nothing in this content, or on this blog should be considered, or used as a substitute for, medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. This site is strictly for education and awareness of child abuse. You should always talk to your health care provider for diagnosis and treatment, including your specific medical needs.

Not all abused children will experience disorders. However, depending upon the duration and severity; many will suffer with one or more of the following: Continue reading “Psychological Disorders Associated With Child Abuse”

Personality Disorders From Abuse

Nothing in this content, or on this blog should be considered, or used as a substitute for, medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. This site is strictly for education, support and awareness of child abuse. You should always talk to your health care provider for diagnosis and treatment, including your specific medical needs.

Not all abused children will experience disorders. However, depending upon the duration and severity; many will suffer with one or more of the following: Continue reading “Personality Disorders From Abuse”

Why Bring it up Now?

For adult survivors of child abuse; it is not an uncommon thing for them to have buried and forgotten their abuse. It is one of our defense mechanisms for survival. Many may never recall the abuse. While others may not remember until they are middle-aged, or older. The repression of child abuse memories is called “Trauma Amnesia.”
Others in your life may ask you, “Why bring all this up now?” It is not an uncommon question you may be asked now that you’ve decided to fight and get your life back to the fullest extent possible. Most people do not realize the lasting impact of child abuse. It touches every aspect of your being across your life. We were robbed of our childhoods; it has affected every relationship we have ever been in; it has destroyed our self-esteem and confidence; some of the damage will never be repaired; the abuse effects present day relationships and those to come; we will never live up to our full potential; no one ever gets use to going hungry; those of us who went without food will never be as intelligent as we might have been had we received the proper nutrition to grow our brains—just to name a few. That is why we bring this up now! Continue reading “Why Bring it up Now?”