Cast of Characters

Editor’s Note: The following article is a cast of characters from my manuscript detailing my own abuse. Please see “My Story of Abuse” under the category link.

My personal story of abuse and neglect will be told in story format. I am currently working on a manuscript about my abuse; and therefore, I will use those stories (true) for my blog spot. The characters names are the same as in my manuscript.

Cast of Characters

Crystal – the oldest child

Darcie – the middle child

Victoria – the youngest child (also, at age thirteen an alter comes forth by the same name of Victoria)

Dottie – Victoria’s family nickname

Dot – Her Dad referred to her as Dot (she was also the alter that held all the pain and abuse)

Mara – the Mother

Joe – the Father

Broch – Victoria’s Husband

Joshua – Broch and Victoria’s Son

Elaine – Crystal’s Daughter

Greg & Louise – Broch’s cousins

Michael – first serious relationship after Broch’s death
Continue reading “Cast of Characters”

Seek Out Professional Help

Professional Help

Child abuse destroys lives. If you suspect your child is being abused, or you know your child has been abused you will need the expertise of the professionals to treat the child as soon as possible to prevent acute problems in the future. If you are an adult survivor of child abuse, you too, need to seek the help from professionals to guide you through the healing process.
A multitude of child abuse treatment professionals are available to assist you on your road to recovery. You need a professional to assess your child’s needs, or your needs to access the damage done and to make recommendations for treatment. The following is a list of professionals you can turn to that will see you through the process of healing: primary care doctor’s recommendations, psychiatrists, psychologists, and social workers. Continue reading “Seek Out Professional Help”

Personality Disorders From Abuse

Nothing in this content, or on this blog should be considered, or used as a substitute for, medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. This site is strictly for education, support and awareness of child abuse. You should always talk to your health care provider for diagnosis and treatment, including your specific medical needs.

Not all abused children will experience disorders. However, depending upon the duration and severity; many will suffer with one or more of the following: Continue reading “Personality Disorders From Abuse”

What is Traumatic Amnesia?

Traumatic Amnesia is usually contributed to child sexual abuse. When a child is being abused, oftentimes, they have not a clue what is happening to them. It’s horrifying and all you want to do is escape. We have the ability to do just that—our minds takes us away to a better place until the act is over. When we “come back” we have no recollection of the abuse. Although, the damage is still on-going in our minds and bodies. Everyone believed me to be very shy, but it was fear they were witnessing. If there was someone strange around, I would hide behind someone because they couldn’t see me, thus, they couldn’t get me. Continue reading “What is Traumatic Amnesia?”

Why Bring it up Now?

For adult survivors of child abuse; it is not an uncommon thing for them to have buried and forgotten their abuse. It is one of our defense mechanisms for survival. Many may never recall the abuse. While others may not remember until they are middle-aged, or older. The repression of child abuse memories is called “Trauma Amnesia.”
Others in your life may ask you, “Why bring all this up now?” It is not an uncommon question you may be asked now that you’ve decided to fight and get your life back to the fullest extent possible. Most people do not realize the lasting impact of child abuse. It touches every aspect of your being across your life. We were robbed of our childhoods; it has affected every relationship we have ever been in; it has destroyed our self-esteem and confidence; some of the damage will never be repaired; the abuse effects present day relationships and those to come; we will never live up to our full potential; no one ever gets use to going hungry; those of us who went without food will never be as intelligent as we might have been had we received the proper nutrition to grow our brains—just to name a few. That is why we bring this up now! Continue reading “Why Bring it up Now?”

40 Red Flags for Child Abuse

There is an abundance of signs and symptoms when a child is being abused. The child may feel ashamed, embarrassed, fearful, guilty, or confused. General red flags you should watch for:

– Frequent absences from school and other activities
– Depression, nervousness, clinginess, rebellious or defiant behavior
– Changes in school performance
– A child that’s angry, resentful, aggressive or exhibits a loss of self-confidence
– Attempts at running away
– Bed-wetting
– Poor appetite
– Suicide attempts
– Frightened of parents
Continue reading “40 Red Flags for Child Abuse”

Pandora’s Project

Reprinted with permission from, Pandora’s Project

Older People Surviving Child Sexual Abuse
2010 Pandora’s Aquarium
By: Louise

Note: While it’s true that some older survivors of child sexual abuse can have experiences that trigger a powerful resurgence of past trauma, this article is not meant to state that this will be the case for all. Rather, I hope it will be a comfort and offer support to older survivors who are experiencing a hard time with their pasts. You are not alone, and it is not hopeless.

It is well-documented by writers and researchers that there are times in the lives of abuse survivors when they will be more prone to thoughts and feelings about their histories. Circumstances that can instigate the re-opening of abuse-related wounds include pregnancy, a fresh encounter with sexual assault whether against the survivor or somebody close, children becoming the same age the survivor was at the time of their assault, or being in a safe relationship and no longer needing to merely survive. Another context for the arousal of early abuse-related trauma can be approaching, or having entered, middle-age. Continue reading “Pandora’s Project”



Am I avoiding the issue by avoiding the pain?

Is it really my fault? Am I truly insane?

They say there’s a child inside us all

I think I can see her so sad and so small

She’s hiding and fearful, won’t come out no way

to stay down inside where it’s safe and there’s others

to protect her from rapists and fathers and mothers

the other have warned her it’s dangerous outside

there’s tears and there’s anger she’d much rather hide

So, I do what I have to to keep her from harm

Way down in my soul all covered and warm

I’ll let her stay in there; I’m stronger than she

I’m outside and empty, while she’s really me

Author Unknown


A warm welcome to everyone! My name is Victoria, a survivor of severe child abuse (physically, emotionally, sexually, and neglect.)

It is my mission to help victims of child abuse become survivors too; help families understand the many aspects of child abuse and how they can help the victim; inform the public and judicial system of the devastation of being abused; and pursue punishment equal to the crime.

Hopefully, my blog will help therapists with their patients—giving them a resource where they can read for encouragement, support, affirmation, healing, recovery, and understanding the damage done. Continue reading “Introduction”